7 Visualization Tools for Releasing Worry
27 Feb 2012 2 Comments
Just prior to selecting one of the following visualization tools, guide your child into a relaxed space. Find a comfortable position with few distractions. Take a few deep breaths together and explain that the purpose of your meeting is to use your imagination to “say goodbye to worries”. For especially anxious children, you will need to have a meeting daily for a while so that their minds can rehearse and repeat this practice, establishing new mental patterns that promote calm and ease.
Guide your child in a body scan. Tell him you are going to go and find the worries and collect them so that you can send them away and feel better. Invite him to close their eyes and look inside their bodies for any place that a worry might be. See if he can find where the worry is. Ask him to describe what it looks like, (color, shape, texture, temperature, etc…). Next tell him that you are going to do some activities to send away the worries and select from one of the following tools.
- Vacuum Cleaner. Use a brilliant vacuum cleaner designed by the child to come and vacuum up the worry. Take the vacuum bag out of the cleaner and send it off to the dump, far far away. Bury it deep in the ground
- Trap Door. Put the worry into a package and place it in front of a trap door. On the count of three, open the trap door and watch the package jet away down the longest shoot ever and disappear.
- Bubble. Put the worry into a bubble and send it off into space. When it has floated very far away, pop the bubble! Watch the worry vanish.
- Feather. Transform the worry into a feather. Place the feather on your hand and blow. Not gone yet? Blow again and again and again until that feather floats away.
- Worry Soap. Place the worry on your hand. Get a giant bottle of neon, sparkly worry soap and squirt the soap all over your hand, making foamy expanding bubbles. Scrub scrub scrub those bubbles. Add a blast spray of water, washing the worry away down the drain.
- Rock. Transform the worry into a rock. Get a helicopter to drop the worry into an active volcano that will melt the worry and send it shooting far into the air as lava that runs slowly far away into the ocean. Repeat the process until all the worries have been transformed.
- Rocket Ship. Put your worries in a rocket ship and blast it off to outer space. Send the worries up, up, up to be transported to another galaxy far far away. Allow the rocket ship to have an infinite supply of fuel so that it can travel light years away.
After each one of these, do an internal body scan in your imagination and see if there is any worry left. Ask you child to check in with that initial spot and see if it has changed in any way. If there is still worry in the spot, then repeat the process until there is no worry left. Follow up the activity with a relaxation tool to relax the body and let go, returning to calm and feelings of wellbeing.
It happens occasionally that a child doesn’t find any worry inside, but has been sharing one verbally with you prior to the body scan. If that is the case, simply bypass the body scan and ask your child if he would like to imagine placing the worry in a package. Then proceed with the visualization tools.
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Relaxation Seeds
23 Feb 2012 Leave a Comment
in Family Relaxation Tags: relaxation; tools; reminders; intention; peace; stress
Chances are, if you are reading this, you have experience with a child who struggles with stress, anxiety, or other strong emotions. And, if you are like me, then there are times when you fervently wish that you had a magic wand that would create peace wherever pointed.
I am writing this to remind you and to remind me that we are gardeners in this field of relaxation techniques. We cultivate the ground, fertilize the soil, plant seeds of relaxation and water them with care. But, we never truly know when they will sprout and grow. Our job as the gardener does not involve digging in the soil to check on the seeds. Our job is to plant the seeds and to let go with patience and love. End of story. Period. No amount of magic wand waving or wishing will change the fact that the relaxation seeds sprout when they are ready, just like all other seeds.
My daughter has been challenged this week with stressful thoughts about eighth grade homework. As she was becoming more and more frustrated, more and more stressed out, her tears and thoughts appeared to cycle around and around, getting stuck on “I don’t have enough time to get it done. I never have downtime with you on school nights. I can’t have fun anymore. There is too much work.” She was working herself into a stressful cycle that began to infiltrate both ends of the day, bedtime and waking.
I suggested techniques, I modeled techniques, did what I could to promote a peaceful environment, and tried all the distraction tools I could think of. Nothing appeared to be working. I played music in the bathroom in the morning, even Katy Perry, who is not my first choice of the day, and nothing seemed to shift the focus from STRESS. I was getting frustrated too.
Then, one night, after several nights in the cycle, seemingly out of the blue, my daughter made a request before bed. She said, “Hey, you know that Katy Perry song about money? Could you play it tomorrow while I am in the shower? It is one of my favorites.” “Of course,” I replied. Then it struck me. I never know for sure the impact that my “seeds” are having. I don’t know which things will touch her, if they will touch her, or when. I don’t know when the relaxation seeds will sprout or how they will actually grow.
Each moment provides us that opportunity to return and return again to our intentions and alignment with out desired outcome, regardless of what is actually going on around us. Each moment brings the opportunity to be a space of peace, to be open to expanding into the present moment. Showing up is the first step. Continuing to show up is the second step and all the steps that follow.
You never now when your relaxation seeds will suddenly sprout and grow into beautiful peaceful moments. Keep planting. Keep growing within yourself. And have fun doing it!!!
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Ocean Breathing–One Minute Relaxer
21 Feb 2012 Leave a Comment
in All Relaxation Activities, Deep Breathing, One Minute Relaxers
Have some fun with deep breathing today and teach your child ocean breathing, otherwise known as ujjai pranayama in the yogic traditions. It is known as the ocean breath because of the ocean-like sound made in the back of the throat while breathing in and out. It helps your child to slow down the airflow, allowing for longer, deeper, slower breaths. This in turn, gives the body a chance to use more oxygen since the breath is slowed.
Call this practice ocean breathing to give it a fun image while trying it out. It is a centering breath because it provides a focal point. Your child’s focus is reigned in as she concentrates on the sound emanating from the back of her throat. It is the perfect one-minute relaxer that can be done anywhere.
Explanation Ideas and Steps:
(Suggested supply: hand held mirror)
First, explain to your child that you are going breathe making the sound of the ocean. Invite her to think about the ocean while you are practicing. Start with a little visualization. Take a moment to close your eyes and see the waves crashing on the shore, listen to the sound of the surf upon the sand.
- Start by holding the hand held mirror in front of you, (or hold your hand up, palm facing inward, holding a pretend mirror if you don’t have a real one). Take a full breath in, breathing slowly and allowing the stomach to expand while you inhale. Then exhale, forcing the air out like you are trying to fog up the mirror. Allow the back of your throat to constrict, just slightly to make the “haaaah” sound while exhaling. It might sound a bit like hissing. No need to push or force, just allow. It should be very soothing, sounding like the roar of the waves upon the sand. Repeat this practice several times.
- Once your child understands how to make the sound through her mouth, she is ready to try it while inhaling and exhaling through the nose. Inhale through the nose, gently constricting the throat and passage of air. Pause. Exhale, gently constricting the throat and pushing the air back out. Pause.
- Remember to exhale as long as possible and pause slightly after the exhale if possible. This allows for ultimate relaxation within the body.
After you have learned the breath, you might want to play some ocean sounds on your ipod/iphone while you are doing it, (See Nature: At the Beach on the downloadable free mobile app Relaxation Lite, Silent Island, http://itunes.apple.com/us/app/silent-island-relaxation-lite/id299531614?mt=8).
Guided Imagery Resources
19 Feb 2012 4 Comments
in Educator Resources, Parenting Resources, Resources Tags: amazon, charlotte reznick, guided imagery scripts
Looking for some fun guided imagery tools to share with your child? This is the book for you: The Power of Your Child’s Imagination by Charlotte Reznick, Ph.D. Dr. Reznick, www.imageryforkids.com, shares nine essential tools that parents and educators can use to support children in applying guided imagery to heal stress and/or strong emotions and to support healing and health, emotionally, physically, and psychologically. She has presented the tools in a clear, easy to apply manner. The tools are developmentally sensitive to a child’s growth and understanding and are fun and engaging.
http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss_1?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=The+Power+of+Your+Child%27s+Imagination&x=0&y=0
Another book that I love is Guided Imagery for Healing Children and Teens by Ellen Curran. She does an excellent job at explaining the various stages of the guided imagery process and the science behind why it works. Her guided imagery scripts are easy to read and are divided between younger children and those for teens. The scripts are specifically oriented toward supporting children with a physical health concern, but could be easily adapted for other uses. Next time you want to support your child who isn’t feeling well, try out this book to support him in relaxation while he heals.
http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=Guided+imagery+for+Healing+Children+and+teens&x=0&y=0
Mind Pirates! Make Them Walk the Plank!
16 Feb 2012 1 Comment
Thoughts that hijack your day and contribute to feelings of stress and un-ease, are what my kids, my students and I call Mind Pirates. Some days there are many mind pirates setting sail on the seas of our mind, making stormy and uncomfortable feelings as a result. Mind pirates are synonymous with negative thought patterns. Our thoughts directly influence how we feel. When you or your child is feeling stressed, it helps to pause for a moment to take inventory of the thoughts that are whirling around in your mind. Stressful feelings come from stressful thoughts. So if we want to feel peaceful, then we have to think peacefully. I have been working on mind pirates in the school setting, however you can apply this to home
This week at school we have been working with our Mind Pirates. I explain that a pirate is someone who steals something, usually something valuable like treasure. So Mind Pirates are thoughts that steal away your readiness to learn or your ability to feel good in the moment. When you are thinking many mind pirates, then you are feeling stressed, distracted, unfocused and or uncertain about learning. What can we do about it? We can get your mind pirates to walk the plank! Here’s how to do it:
Step One: Identify The Mind Pirates
- Quiet your mind by closing your eyes and taking two long, slow deep breaths.
- Next, think about a time you were struggling in the classroom, when you were not feeling good about your schoolwork. Tell me about it. What was going on around you? (Pause) What were you thinking in that moment? What thoughts bother you in class? What thoughts steal your attention away from your work? Those are your mind pirate thoughts.
- Write down those thoughts next to the pirate on the paper.
Step Two: Mind Pirates Walk the Plank
- Focus on the thoughts you wrote down and turn them around to be treasure thoughts. Treasure thoughts are thoughts that help you learn, and help you to feel good about yourself as a student. You have the power to make mind pirates walk the plank as you transform them into treasure thoughts. For example, the mind pirate “I can’t do this, it is too hard,” can walk the plank and turn into “Even though this is hard, I try my best and take my time.” Think about what you want to think, feel or do in the classroom and write it down next to the plank.
- Spend some time writing treasure thoughts for the classroom. Focus on what you do well, what you are good at, what is easy for you. The more treasure thoughts you think, the better you feel and the more ready you are for learning.
Step Three: Practice a Relaxation Technique
To keep those treasure thoughts going and to enhance feelings of relaxation in the classroom, finish this work by practicing a relaxation technique. We chose the sea turtle, http://wp.me/p11MDD-8K, but you can supplement with any that fits your child and/or your classroom.
Relaxation Practice Log
04 Feb 2012 Leave a Comment
Rehearsal is key to mastery. The more we practice something, the more it becomes an integral part of life. If you and your child have the goal of feeling more relaxed and calm, then practice is your key to adopting relaxation practice and feelings as automatic response patterns in life. With our busy schedules, it is often challenging to add anything more, especially when the practice may or may not be out of the comfort zone. If your and your child’s life has been on running on high, then slowing down might not feel so comfortable when you first get started. Practice is your key. One way to begin integrating the daily practice of relaxation techniques into your life, is to make a Relaxation Practice Log. This log can serve as your checklist to make sure that daily attention and focus are directed at your goal of feeling more relaxed. It can also serve as a record and cause for celebration after a week of practiced relaxation activities. I have included a downloadable pdf here to get you started. It contains activities from this site, but feel free to create your own log, including your favorite relaxation techniques. Happy relaxation practice!!!!!
Five Ideas For Creating Peaceful Mornings Before School
02 Feb 2012 7 Comments
How the morning flows has great impact on the rest of the day. When we are able to create peaceful, graceful mornings, we are better able to create peaceful fulfilling days, or at least better adept to weather any stress that might appear in the day ahead. The more peaceful the time at home, the better prepared the child is for learning at school. Here are some ideas to consider as you begin your day:
1. Set the Stage
Create a relaxing environment for the morning routine. Keep the lights low, sounds to a minimum. Play music that you love. I play energizing, dance music in the bathroom while my daughters and I shower and get ready. We sing and jive, getting a jump start on feeling good. However, I like to wake up to gentle, relaxing music, easing my way into the day with quiet time. I have downloaded some of my favorite meditation music on my iphone and play it while I am waking up and waking up my daughters.
2. Gentle Beginnings
Wake up your child with a soft greeting such as “Good morning, love.” Give a back rub or a gentle massage or snuggle for one minute with your child before getting out of bed. Remember to note how your child likes to wake up. You can ask him if he would like to snuggle or not. Start the day with gentle choices. Pay attention to your voice volume and rhythm.
3. Even Pace
Avoiding the morning rush is key to staying calm and promoting feelings of peace. Make sure any advance preparation, such as laying out of clothes or packing lunches, happens the night before to avoid rush during the basic morning routine.
I have a friend, a single dad, who was having trouble getting his boys to stay on task while getting ready for school. He noticed that he was repeating over and over what they needed to do and that somehow they had learned to tune him out. We developed a checklist of morning routine activity steps and engaged the boys in picking a fun ringtone on the phone to signal the end of basic tasks. There was a duck quack for the end of teeth brushing, a chime for the completion of getting dressed, a horn honking for time to get in the car. That way both my friend and his boys didn’t have the stress of his repetitive reminders to stay on task and the boys felt a sense of relaxing into self-direction and knowing clear expectations regarding time.
4. Basic Needs
Getting those basic needs of affection and nutrition met are essential ingredients for the creation of peaceful mornings. Find ways to squeeze in a hug or two as you are getting ready for school. If your child is open to it, particularly for younger children, hold hands on the way to the car or into the school. Remember that touch can be very relaxing when it honors and considers how the recipient wants to receive it. Ask first, but offer moments for hugs, cuddling, and pausing to connect with your child, listening and tuning into the present moment. Make sure there is adequate time to spend on breakfast. Schedule time to sit down and finish the meal. When our basic needs are met, we feel relaxed and at ease. Pay attention to what those needs are for your child, meet those needs, and notice how her body and mind relaxes as a result.
5. Set Your Mind To It
Adding two minutes to the morning to talk with your child about how he or she thinks about the day ahead makes all the difference in how the day will unfold. Take two minutes to create a vision of the day. Ask your child what he or she wants to experience, wants to happen. State it in present tense and in the affirmative. For example, I am feeling calm and relaxed as I take my spelling test. I remember just what I need to know. I stay focused during class and remember to take a mental break when I need to. I have fun playing tetherball with my friends at recess. Notice that it is stated in the present tense and explains the parts of her day as she wishes them to happen, stating them as if they are happening in that way.
Sing a couple of affirmations in the car on the way to school or daycare. Have fun making up a fun or crazy tune to the words “I am beautiful and I am a wonderful friend.” “I am strong and full of courage.”
Have a beautiful peaceful day!!!
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