Stress Bot: Do The Body Scan
26 Mar 2012 1 Comment
http://www.freedigitalphotos.net/images/view_photog.php?photogid=2280
Getting your child to pause for a moment to do a body scan can be, uh hum (clear throat), sometimes challenging. At least it has been in my experience. Let’s face it, we are a world on the run, most of the time, and our moments are crammed with appointments, outings, events, playmates, and encounters of the friend kind. However, one of the first steps in teaching your child calming techniques, is to get her to pay attention, with detail, to what is going on inside her body. You must be able to recognize tension, and discern where it is in the body, before you can do anything about it (such as, start a calming technique).
Try out this fun way to engage your child in doing frequent body scans to determine where the tension lies within the body. Play Stress Bot. You, parent, get to be the Stress Bot, who specializes in helping kids scan for stress and tension in the body. Introduce your child to the concept of the Stress Bot and explain that you and the Stress Bot are going to help him find places of stress or tension in his body. Now, adopt your best “robot voice” and guide your child using the following script:
Assume comfortable position. Begin to turn your eyes and ears inward to listen to the body and pay attention to how you are feeling. Breathe slowly in and out. Repeat. In and out. Excellent work. Bring your attention to your toes on your left foot. How do they feel? Now check your left ankle. Can you feel it? If not, wiggle it a little bit. Now check in with your left leg. Is there any stress or tension there? Breathe. Imagine that you are releasing any tension that you find, like pulling the lid off of a jar of steam. Good! Let’s focus on the toes of your right foot. Wiggle them a bit. How do they feel? Let go of any tension that you find. Now your right ankle. Now pay attention to your right leg. Breathe. Relax. Excellent!
Now we check in with your lower back. How is your back touching the floor or chair? How does your stomach feel? Any time you find some stress, just let it go, like a puff of steam into the air. Good. Pay attention to the back of your neck. How does it feel? Check in with your head. Does it feel light or heavy? Feel your ears, the roots of your hair, your forehead, your cheeks. Can you feel your teeth? How do they feel? How does your tongue feel inside your mouth? Feel the top of your head. Breathe. Relax. Did you find tension anywhere? If so, just allow it to melt into the floor, to fall away from you. Now sit quietly for a few seconds. Check out your whole body. Imagine a cloud of relaxation is ready to swish right over all of you, taking with it any stress or tension that you found. Great work!!!! Now you know just where stress or tension likes to hide in your body.
Explain to your child that Stress Bot is always on call to help him scan his body to see if there is tension or stress there. Invite him to call upon Stress Bot any time he is not feeling good to see where the source of the feeling is inside his body. After Stress Bot helps him find the stress, he can use one of his favorite relaxation tools to help get the stress out of his body and begin to feel good and more relaxed.
This quick check-in is excellent for you to use when you are on the go and you would like your child to do a quick body scan or “check in.”
Quick Stress Bot Body Scan Script, (please stay in character with your best robot voice):
Hands on head. How is it feelings?
Hands on heart. How is it beating?
Hands together. Calm or shaking?
Breathe and do a body scan.
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7 Benefits of “Special Place” Guided Imagery
22 Mar 2012 1 Comment
in Guided Imagery, Uncategorized
When I was a little girl I had a favorite tree. It was nestled deep in the forest behind my house. It’s beautiful, massive, strong root system jetted straight out from the soil, creating a network of limbs over the creek below. I would climb into those roots, sitting on my very own nature’s bench, suspended over the rushing creek, to dangle my feet in the icy water below. I could sit there for what seemed like hours, relaxed, calm, lost in the mystical world of my imagination. Sometimes late at night, when the old farmhouse was creaking, and every shadow made my heart pound stronger, I would imagine that I was back in the protection of my tree. Little did I know that I was practicing my own form of “special place” guided imagery. I was traveling back to my “special place” in my imagination in order to feel more calm, secure and relaxed.
Finding your own special place using guided imagery is a popular technique. It is beneficial for some of the following reasons:
- Security. It allows your child to create a safe place in his mind that he can return to whenever he is needing a boost of feeling safe and secure.
- Predictability. The special place only changes if your child decides that it should. Practicing special place guided imagery and repeating the exercise over time works to establish a predictable environment in the imagination. This is especially useful in times of transition or disorganization/chaos.
- Container. Completing a special place guided imagery script gives the child a container to feel safe in. There are boundaries and the special place is just that, a specifically identified space where your child can depend on knowing where it begins and ends and all the things within it.
- Power/Control. Special place guided imagery meets the need to have power/control and influence over one’s own environment. By imagining a special place, you have the power to create anything you would like in that place. No one is invited into your special place without your permission. If you are a child who is highly sensitive to others’ invasion of your personal space or has had difficulty with others invading personal space without permission, then this activity helps to re-build the sense of power/control/influence over your own personal space.
- Positive Viewpoint. Special place guided imagery can be used to shift a negative viewpoint or fixation on the negative things in life to more a positive perspective. What a wonderful tool to use when you need a shift, as most of us do from time to time.
- Neural Net. Brain science and the phenomenon of brain plasticity, suggest that the neural nets in the brain, i.e. the firing connections between groups of neurons (brain cells), is strengthened through rehearsal and repetition. This research shows that the brain actually molds itself around repetitive firing patterns between brain cells. What this means for relaxation practice is that the more you rehearse feeling good, calm and relaxed in your mind, the more you will establish an automatic neural net that fires when you start to practice. The neural net will build around the connections of visiting a special place and feeling good. Practice and repeat this over time and, soon, simply thinking about your special place will elicit feelings of relaxation, regardless of whether you do the entire guided imagery script or not. What a lovely association.
- Creativity. Special place guided imagery is a creative experience. Closing your eyes and having the opportunity to create a place unique for yourself is hugely creative and greases the wheels of the imagination. Depending on the script used, your child has the opportunity to add waterfalls, planets, trees, dessert sand at will, the options for creative expression are limitless.
Try out this “special place” guided imagery script to start:
Peaceful Doggie Relaxation
20 Mar 2012 2 Comments
I learn so much from my dog. She is always showing me how to just BE in the moment and to LOVE each and every day. Any time someone in the house is feeling down or upset, she is the first on the scene to provide a loving empathetic wag of the tail or lick of the hand. She’s so constant! So attentive to loving. That is why dogs make such wonderful therapeutic pets. Just being around many of them initiates feelings of peace and wellbeing.
So, given that, here’s a doggie relaxation exercise that you can practice today.
Doggie Shake
1. Do a body check and notice where all of the tension is currently showing up in the body.
2. Glue your feet to the floor.
3. Imagine that you are going to shake like a wet dog. As you shake, all the tension is going to leave your body.
4. Shake the legs first. Shake, shake, shake. Follow with the arms, hands, and then whole body. Keep your feet firmly in place while you shake and bounce out your tension. Think about a dog shaking off water, as you shake, imagine little droplets of stress flying away from you as you shake back and forth.
5. Repeat several times. Then lie down like a resting dog and focus on melting into the floor. Pay attention to your body and see if there is any tingling left over from all the shaking. Sometimes your body could feel as if it was buzzing with light energy. Relax and let all of your cares melt away. Think about a doggie that you know that is able to lie on the floor and totally relax, legs fall to the sides, arms are floppy. Enjoy being like a peaceful doggie!
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Stress Rating Charts–Five Ways To Make It Fun!
15 Mar 2012 3 Comments
in Educator Resources, Family Relaxation, Relaxation Practice, Uncategorized
I believe that relaxation practice must be engaging, fun, and rewarding if we are going to see ultimate buy-in and interest from our kids. Since body awareness is an essential first step component to relaxation practice, (i.e. ya gotta know when you are stressed and how much to know when ya need to use a tool and what tool to use), I like to introduce some fun ways to show kids how to check in with their bodies to know the various levels of stress and how stress impacts them, both physically and mentally.
One way to begin to pay attention to and monitor stress levels is to use a stress rating chart. A stress rating chart allows kids to pair a metaphoric theme (eg. food, critter or nature) with the level of stress they are feeling in their body. For instance, if you were feeling very low stress, at level one, you could relate it to feeling like a still lake or a clear sky. Feeling ultimate stress, or level 5, would relate to a volcano that was about to erupt. Show children that levels 3 and above usually require the use of a relaxation tool in order to get back to a level 2 or 1. Possible ways to explain the chart use include:
1. Go through each level and discuss how the body feels when that level of stress is experienced. Discuss particular bodily sensations that are possible, (eg. sweaty hands, shortness of breath, feeling hot or cold, dizzy, intense focus or lack of focus, etc. . . ). Talk about how it relates to the metaphor provided and ask your child if she agrees with the metaphoric example. If not, you might need to change the example to one more meaningful for her.
2. Cut apart the levels and allow your child to re-arrange them in order. Discuss why each one goes where it does and how the body feels at each level.
3. Write life scenarios, real or imagined, that relate to each level and invite your child to talk about why they feel a certain level of stress when they encounter that scenario. Match each scenario with a level on the chart. Put the scenarios in a box and select one a day for discussion.
4. Complete role plays in which you act out using and/or teaching a relaxation tool. Take turns being the instructor and the instructed. Discuss where you think your stress would register on the chart before and after applying the tool.
5. Play charades. Act out a stressful scenario or a relaxing scenario and then guess which level the person is demonstrating.
Try out the following charts and let me know what you think!
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Stargirl–Starting the Relaxation Conversation
13 Mar 2012 1 Comment
There are many ways to invite your child to begin a relaxation practice. You could simply start chanting OM in the car on the way to school, (I’ve done that). Or, your kids could stumble across you sitting in half lotus one morning on the front porch. I believe modeling is the key to initiating any new practice in your parenting life. Making relaxation practice an integral part of your own life is the first step before introducing the practice to your child or inviting her to join you. Another fun way to get the ball rolling is to use literature. What better way than to read about your favorite characters, who you care about and have bonded with, relaxing and becoming mindful? Allow them to model it for you too.
A favorite of mine is the book, Stargirl by Jerry Spinelli. It has been a highlight of my week to facilitate 5th grade Stargirl groups during lunch. I love diving into relevant topics such as peer pressure, fitting in, popularity, positive self talk, self-identify, integrity, and the ability to stand by your beliefs no matter the circumstance. The excerpt in which Stargirl talks about “erasing herself” and demonstrates a meditation practice on pages 90-94 is an excellent scene to begin a family relaxation practice discussion. On these pages Stargirl invites Leo to sit with her in the dessert so she can show him what it is like to “do nothing.” Then Leo describes his experience as he sits in silence for the first time and attempts to “erase himself.”
Stargirl shares: The earth is speaking to us, but we can’t hear because of all of the racket that our senses are making. Sometimes we need to erase them, erase our senses. Then –maybe–the earth will touch us. The universe will speak. The stars will whisper.
There is a lovely guided imagery exercise that follows the above quote, beginning on page 91. Stargirl explains how she experiences “nothing” by imagining a big, soft pink eraser in her mind as she beings to “erase” her body parts, one part at a time. It reminds me of a progressive relaxation, minus the tensing of the body part first. Try it out with your tween or teen, it is fabulous fun and is an excellent short guided imagery activity.
Not only does Stargirl provide a beautiful glimpse into the experience of the meditation experience, it is a lovely tale of a girl who will do whatever it takes to hold onto her sense of enchantment with the world around her. A real heart opening story.
For additional Jerry Spinelli books, visit his website at www.jerryspinelli.com. He also has information about starting a Stargirl Society and includes discussion questions for a book study.
The thing is, there’s no difference anymore between me and the universe.
The boundary is gone.
I am it and it is me.
I am a stone, a cactus thorn. I am rain.
She smiled dreamily, “I like that most of all, being rain.”
–Stargirl
http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss_1?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=Stargirl
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Mobile Relaxation App?
09 Mar 2012 2 Comments
Have you ever considered using a mobile app to help your kids relax? I am checking out the market place to see if it would be a good idea to develop a mobile app that contains five, one-minute relaxation activities that would be fun, engaging, and easy to do wherever you are. Please help me poll the audience by taking a couple of minutes to share your thoughts on a kids’ relaxation mobile app. There are only 7 questions. Let me know what you think!
Just click on the link below to get started. Thank you so very much! I look forward to hearing what you think.
http://www.surveymonkey.com/s/D7M7YYY
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Magic Wand Progressive Relaxation
08 Mar 2012 1 Comment
in Progressive Relaxation, Uncategorized
A few years ago, I wrote a poem for preschoolers entitled “Butterfly on My Nose.” It was designed to guide preschoolers through progressive relaxation activity while relaxing their face muscles (http://wp.me/p11MDD-1k).
My preschoolers have since grown up, but they are still having fun while using progressive relaxation to release tension from their muscles and let go of daily physical stress within the body. Guide your child through a progressive relaxation activity today. You hold the magic wand to help him relax. Explain to your child that when you lightly touch a body part, it is his job to tense, then relax that part. You can use two fingers together as your magic wand, or create one as a craft project. The power in the wand is to help relax the body. (This activity can be easily done with auditory instruction only, using the imagination to feel the magic wand tap the area to be relaxed. As with any relaxation activity, please ask your child’s permission first, especially if he has sensory issues and is tactile sensitive to light touches).
1. Have your child lie down in a comfortable place on the floor.
2. Gently touch your child’s toes like this:
- Touch One: ”Tense Your Toes, squeeze tight tight tight with all your might.”
- Touch Two: ”Toes Let Go, melt, melt melt your toe muscles into the floor. Relax and let go.”
Repeat for in the following body parts: Calves, Thighs, Legs, Tummy, Hands, Arms, Shoulders, Neck, Face, Whole Body
When you have completed the sequence, wave your wand over the entire body, explaining that, as it passes over you the first time you are to TENSE your whole body, squeezing every part very very tight. As the wand passes over the second time, you are to RELAX, let go of any tension and feel your whole body melting into the floor.
Remind your child that he has the power to relax his body whenever he chooses, no matter where he is and no matter what he is doing. That magic wand is in his mind as well and can help him to relax different body parts whenever he wants.
Cloud Thoughts
05 Mar 2012 Leave a Comment
in All Relaxation Activities, Bedtime Relaxation Activities, Family Relaxation, Mindfulness Practice, Positive Self-Talk, Relaxation Practice, Relaxing in Nature, Uncategorized Tags: meditation, mindfulness activity, positive thoughts, relaxation, stress reduction
http://www.freedigitalphotos.net/images/view_photog.php?photogid=3973
Mindfulness is known as the ability to pull your attention into the present moment, increasing your awareness of the thoughts that are happening as they happen. When you pause to let go and really just allow yourself to be in the present moment, relaxation, naturally, just happens!
As you think about trying to explain meditation or mindfulness practice to your child, you might wonder where to begin. It all starts with the ability to be still, to pay attention to the present moment, and to begin increasing awareness about the thoughts you are having. Try this Cloud Thoughts activity with your child as a perfect starting place.
Step One:
(Materials: A fluffy cloud day, a spot of lush green grass, a blanket and some sunglasses) Invite your child to go with you outside, to lie down in the grass, and to watch the clouds in the sky. Tell her that you are going to take a cloud journey, simply paying attention to the clouds as they float across the sky. Share with her that you are going to do it in silence and that there will be time to share your experiences with each other later. Spend a few moments just relaxing on the blanket and watching the clouds as float past. Watch as they dance, float, morph and transform on their journey across the sky. See what kind of animals or shapes they make. You can share your experiences with each other later while you are doing step two.
Step Two:
(Materials: timer, crayons, pencils and paper) Go back inside and get some drawing materials. Draw a picture of clouds with your child. Place it in front of you and set a timer for 3 minutes. Tell your child that you are going to simply watch the picture, just like you did outside, and pay attention to the thoughts that drift into and out of your mind like clouds. No need to try to stop or change the thoughts, just watch them with interest. If you like, you can pretend you are a thought scientist and you have been given the task to simply notice and pay attention to the thoughts in your head to see what they have to say. You might be surprised at the thoughts, what they contain and what they want to do. You might notice having more or less thoughts. Just watch with interest for three minutes.
Step Three: When three minutes are up, tell your child that you are going to take the picture you have drawn and write in the clouds some of the thoughts you noticed.
Additional Idea for Use:
- Make this a daily practice. Practice for three minutes each day and notice how it gets easier to watch your thoughts drifting in and out and around in your head like clouds in the sky.
- Skip step one and complete steps two and three before bed each night.
- Start a Cloud Thoughts journal for paying attention to and collecting the thoughts in your head. Discuss any changes you notice as you experience the activity over time. Notice if the thoughts change, if the speed with which they float in and out changes, if the speed changes related to how you are feeling that day, if you feel more or less relaxed after the experience, etc. . .
7 Visualization Tools for Releasing Worry
27 Feb 2012 2 Comments
Just prior to selecting one of the following visualization tools, guide your child into a relaxed space. Find a comfortable position with few distractions. Take a few deep breaths together and explain that the purpose of your meeting is to use your imagination to “say goodbye to worries”. For especially anxious children, you will need to have a meeting daily for a while so that their minds can rehearse and repeat this practice, establishing new mental patterns that promote calm and ease.
Guide your child in a body scan. Tell him you are going to go and find the worries and collect them so that you can send them away and feel better. Invite him to close their eyes and look inside their bodies for any place that a worry might be. See if he can find where the worry is. Ask him to describe what it looks like, (color, shape, texture, temperature, etc…). Next tell him that you are going to do some activities to send away the worries and select from one of the following tools.
- Vacuum Cleaner. Use a brilliant vacuum cleaner designed by the child to come and vacuum up the worry. Take the vacuum bag out of the cleaner and send it off to the dump, far far away. Bury it deep in the ground
- Trap Door. Put the worry into a package and place it in front of a trap door. On the count of three, open the trap door and watch the package jet away down the longest shoot ever and disappear.
- Bubble. Put the worry into a bubble and send it off into space. When it has floated very far away, pop the bubble! Watch the worry vanish.
- Feather. Transform the worry into a feather. Place the feather on your hand and blow. Not gone yet? Blow again and again and again until that feather floats away.
- Worry Soap. Place the worry on your hand. Get a giant bottle of neon, sparkly worry soap and squirt the soap all over your hand, making foamy expanding bubbles. Scrub scrub scrub those bubbles. Add a blast spray of water, washing the worry away down the drain.
- Rock. Transform the worry into a rock. Get a helicopter to drop the worry into an active volcano that will melt the worry and send it shooting far into the air as lava that runs slowly far away into the ocean. Repeat the process until all the worries have been transformed.
- Rocket Ship. Put your worries in a rocket ship and blast it off to outer space. Send the worries up, up, up to be transported to another galaxy far far away. Allow the rocket ship to have an infinite supply of fuel so that it can travel light years away.
After each one of these, do an internal body scan in your imagination and see if there is any worry left. Ask you child to check in with that initial spot and see if it has changed in any way. If there is still worry in the spot, then repeat the process until there is no worry left. Follow up the activity with a relaxation tool to relax the body and let go, returning to calm and feelings of wellbeing.
It happens occasionally that a child doesn’t find any worry inside, but has been sharing one verbally with you prior to the body scan. If that is the case, simply bypass the body scan and ask your child if he would like to imagine placing the worry in a package. Then proceed with the visualization tools.
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Relaxation Practice Log
04 Feb 2012 Leave a Comment
Rehearsal is key to mastery. The more we practice something, the more it becomes an integral part of life. If you and your child have the goal of feeling more relaxed and calm, then practice is your key to adopting relaxation practice and feelings as automatic response patterns in life. With our busy schedules, it is often challenging to add anything more, especially when the practice may or may not be out of the comfort zone. If your and your child’s life has been on running on high, then slowing down might not feel so comfortable when you first get started. Practice is your key. One way to begin integrating the daily practice of relaxation techniques into your life, is to make a Relaxation Practice Log. This log can serve as your checklist to make sure that daily attention and focus are directed at your goal of feeling more relaxed. It can also serve as a record and cause for celebration after a week of practiced relaxation activities. I have included a downloadable pdf here to get you started. It contains activities from this site, but feel free to create your own log, including your favorite relaxation techniques. Happy relaxation practice!!!!!
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